Is it OK to be Happy While You Are Sad?
I went to a lecture last weekend called "Letting In While Letting Go". The topic was referring to grief and that while we are letting go of our loss, there is also now more room to let something in that may bring us comfort and joy.
The speaker talked about the Both/And concept:
I can be both sad about ________ and happy about ________.
This was HUGE for me.
I lost my mom unexpectedly a few weeks ago and it has been really tough. I have been doing what I call my grief dance -- one step forward, two steps back, 3 steps sideways, and a big dip -- and was feeling both overwhelmed and a bit guilty about moving ahead with my planned book promotion schedule.
The speaker, however, gave me PERMISSION to do a reframe:
I can be BOTH devastated about missing my mom AND excited about being on TV for "Busy, Stressed, and Food Obsessed!"
Yes, my life has turned upside down (again) but this does not mean that I can't appreciate the moments of joy, laughter, and peace in between the moments of sadness and fear. It's all part of riding the waves of grief.
Do you need a reframe?
Loss of a job, a loved one, or even a time in your life all require mourning, however, the Both/And concept gives us permission to let in the moments of joy. I am starting to do that and am so grateful.
Thank you for letting me share my pain and thank you for letting me share my excitement. Below is a behind-the-scenes peek and here is my first TV clip. It's short and fun and I know my mom would have loved it.